Redefine Beauty

For our Young Women's activity tonight we attended a fantastic seminar. It was one more sign the Lord watches over us. The lesson I was to direct on Sunday just wasn't going smoothly. I kept thinking I need to tell the girls they are loved and enough. I fought the thought until Sunday morning I surrendered and did Thy will. The lesson was great. Lots of spiritual situations. Wednesday fell together like Sunday. We had an activity but it didn't feel right. I was on Instagram and saw an invite to a fireside tonight. The invite jumped out at me and I knew we must attend. A few quick group texts were sent and we had a great turnout. 7 girls came with 2 leaders.
The evening was directed by identical twins, Lindsey and Lexi Kite, who both have their PhD's and are so amazing.
They have been in school for the past 10 years and boy do they have so much to offer. The chapel and gymnasium were packed clear back to the stage. It was packed tighter than some Stake Conferences I have attended.
The message shared was one of great worth. They took turns talking and sharing stories and backed up research. They shared that our bodies do not define us. That social media distorts our body image. They reminded us that Satan denied himself a body and he is so angry about it he is trying to get us to all hate our body. They gave some pretty amazing stats that break my heart. The number of children  under 12 hospitalized due to eating disorders increased 119% from 1999-2006.  Plastic surgery is up 446% since 10 years ago. Social Media targets woman because in households 90% of the money is spent by the woman so that is why the woman's body is the main focus.

Elder Glenn L. Pace 2010 BYU Devotional
"Sisters, I testify that when you stand in front of your Heavenly Parents in those royal courts on high and you look into Her eyes and behold Her countenance any question you ever had about the role of women in the kingdom  will evaporate into the rich celestial air, because at that moment you will see standing directly in front of you, your divine nature and destiny."


Choate, 2007, p 323
"There exists a positive relationship between spirituality, mental and physical health, life satisfaction, and wellness. If a woman draws her sense of meaning from a spiritual force that goes beyond herself and that provides coherence and purpose to the universe, she will find less need to focus on her weight, shape, and appearance in an attempt to find happiness or life."

They discussed how you are in class, the bell rings and you walk out. While in the hall, you don't think about what you just learned you focus on what others are thinking about you. Can others tell my hair is greasy? I need to tug on my shirt or skirt so that others can't see my bulges. The list goes on and on. I know this is so true for me. We learned that woman who believe her value comes from her appearance is more likely to:
Have lower self-esteem
Have unhealthy dating experiences
Depression and anxiety
More likely will look at others with a negative eye and comment on how others look

So many try to help others feel better about themselves the wrong way. If you know someone is struggling we say,"Oh you are cute, you just need to believe me." It doesn't work that way. The way you help others with low self-esteem is to help others see they are more than a body.
Emmaline Withers
Gospel breaks forth the fetters wherewith woman is bound, takes her by the hand and says woman know thyself

The ladies performed a study where they asked hundreds maybe thousands how woman feel about their bodies. 90% of the ladies responded with something negative about their bodies only 10% responded with being proud of their body and what it has accomplished. Being able to be proud of your body and not focus on your body's imperfections will change your ability to handle hard things during this life.
During our life, we will live our lives in a lot of comfort zones and regardless of circumstances we will hit a disruption. We can allow this disruption to sink us into shame or allow us to rise with resilience. Painful situations are for our own good, we learn from pain!  We need to shine a light on shame, light up the things that hurt us. Pain propels us to become the people we were intended to become.
Instead of being dissatisfied with our bodies, we go to social media with our questions. This cream will fix my skin. This pill will lose those extra pounds. Instead of seeking answers and asking what is wrong with you; why not ask; why are they putting images in front of us that unrealistic . The more time you spend on social media the more likely you will compare and look down upon yourself. They suggest doing social media fast just like we fast from food and water they suggest we fast from social media, no internet, no phones. no television, no movies, no technology. These ladies have study after study that when you fast from social media you will be happier. You will be less critical of yourself and others. I find that fascinating. I know in my own life when I am less connected I am more satisfied. I have been less connected this past few days and it feels great. I am present with my surroundings. I hear the still small voice and it's given me great direction.

When giving compliments give them on others characters not just on looks. When you speak to ones character it changes people and it resignates on a deeper level. For example, I think you ARE awesome, compared to I think you LOOK awesome. Simple changes create lasting effects.
They offered 4 steps to help others
1 Mental Might

2 Physical Fortitude

3 Spiritual Strength

4 Social Skillfulness

There is no beauty finish line you have to cross before you deserve to feel good about yourself.
You are worthy of Love Exactly as you are.
What will you do with your power?
Who will you be?
See More. Be More. That is Beauty Redefined.