Like all good ideas, the Lord had a different path for us.I really just wanted a baby and couldn't get the idea out of my mind. I told Corby and he freaked out to say the least. He had more than three years left of schooling and did not think he could provide for us and remain in school. We decided we would pray and fast. I don't recall the exact time frame but it wasn't too much after we fasted that Corby came to me and said,"I believe we can start our family. I had a dream and I want to share it with you".
Corby was on campus attending his classes at Weber State and could hear a baby cry now and again. He would look around but no baby could be found. He continued on his way to class. Once in class he realized the crying was coming from his backpack. He peered inside and pulled the baby out. He fed the baby, changed it's diaper and carried it in the backpack for the remainder of the day. When he woke, he had a peaceful feeling that it was right to begin our family and that he could do it. I think I was pregnant the following month.
I made an appointment with the doctor for some other reason but went thinking I could be pregnant. While at the appointment nurse asked if I was pregnant, routine question, and I said maybe;). Well let's do a pregnancy test and see. It came back negative and I was so sad. I went home completely devastated. What, I wasn't pregnant after one try? Was I defective? A month went by but I never had a period so I went back to the doc and asked what was up. They did another test and this time it was positive. I will never forget the docs words he said, "most likely you will have a girl". When this happens it typically is a girl. So I was pregnant that first appointment it just hadn't registered on the tests yet. I was so excited to think I was pregnant and that it would be a little girl. He gave me a due date of June 24, 1995. Perfection! I was teaching school and last day would be the end of May. I would have a month to prepare for my first bundle of joy.
I didn't have much morning sickness but often times it would hit me in the evening. I was never super ill or threw up but I was a little nauseated and super tired. I would go to bed around 8 o'clock most evenings. It was great!
Corby would attend all the monthly appointments and when we had our ultra sound to confirm you were a girl, we were both so thrilled to see you were healthy and growing on schedule. I had decided I wanted to deliver Leticia all natural. I had read the books and that was the plan for me. I also read that 90% of epeziotomys were done out of convenience for the doctor and were primarily unnecessary. So at my 6 month appointment I announced I would not be having one of those. My doctor was really kind of an arrogant jerk. Back then I did not know you could change doctors or share your opinion so I kept my mouth closed and took everything he told me as "OK, you are the doc and you know what is best". Boy did I learn a lot!
On June 6th I had an appointment and the doctor showed some concern as to how large you seemed to be getting with still three weeks left. I was 37 week gestation and was measuring 42 cm. I had another ultra sound to help estimate your size. They measured your femur bone and predicted you were already 9lbs 3oz. I then had an amniocentesis to see if your lungs were developed enough to live outside the womb. The results came back you were mature enough to be born.With three weeks still left, the doc thought for sure you would be over 10lbs and did not know if I would be able to deliver such a large baby naturally. He put some cream on my cervix to help it soften and sent me home to pack. He told us to be back to the hospital by 6AM June 7th because we were going to have a baby. I was so scared. I hadn't even prepared the bassinet or washed the clothes or linens but I guess you were coming ready or not. We both called our parents to share the exciting news and went home to pack our bags.
I hardly slept that night. I was so nervous. I did not really know what to expect. I had watched Pam, my oldest sister, deliver Mitch many years earlier but that was all I had to go off of.
We arrived on time at the hospital. I was put into a gown and promptly placed in bed with pytosum pumped into my body. Someone told me I couldn't wear contacts while I was delivering a baby so I was sporting my awesome 80's glasses oh yea. Super uncomfortable and not pretty at all. The things I believed back then.
By noon I was at the highest dose of the pit and still nothing was happening. The doc came in and said well let's send you home and we can try again in a week(I wish I would have listened to him on this one) I couldn't imagine going home with empty arms so I asked what other options did I have. He said he could break my water but that would commit me to having this baby in the next 24 hours whatever way that was, caesarean or vaginally. I had mentally prepared myself that I was having baby so I said let's do it, break my water. Doc broke my water at 1PM and the contractions began to come pretty regularly. I was still on full dose of pit and had not any drugs up to this point. By 5:15 the contractions were on top of each other and getting really strong. I was getting so tired because it had already been such a long time. Doc came in and reminded that I would have 2 hours of pushing once I was fully dilated. By 5:15 I gave up my dream of a drug free delivery and received the epidural. It was awful. I couldn't feel from my waste down.
Doc wasn't lying I really did push for 2 hours but at 7:50AM Leticia Elizabeth Hansen made her grand entrance. Weighing in at 7lbs 13oz and 21.5", kind of close to 9lbs 3oz;) the reason for the huge discrepancy is due to Leticia having long legs. Either way she was finally here. She had lots of blonde thick hair. I heard over and over wow you don't see babies with this much hair and that color, is her hair honey blonde? I was so excited when the doctor first put you in my arms. Motherhood at last. My dream since I was a young child was finally real.
Because you were forced to come you did not do well on the ApGar test. You were large in size but premature in ability. You were a little jaundice but not enough that we had to hospitalize you. You did not want to suck so dad taught you with a syringe with sugar water. The nurses taught us this little trick and it magically worked because at 6 weeks you were almost 15lbs, that's right you almost doubled you birth weight in 6 weeks. Straight momma's
I am not gonna lie, there were days I thought you weren't going to make it, due to my inadequacies but we all survived. The hardest part about you for me in the beginning was that you refused to take a bottle. Momma was the only source of nutrition. You would eat every 2 hours for 20 minutes day and night. By week 7, I was so sleep deprived I became delirious. But magically at week 8 you slept at least 8 hours through the night. Blessings from heaven. I found myself again and was able to be the mother I wanted.
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