Keeping with the theme of this blog being our journal, I am trying to update the journal parts of the past few years. I try to think of the things I want my girls to know and remember about their parents. This decision Corby and I made almost 6 years ago has changed everything about our lives, some for the better, some for worse, but can't change the past just learn from mistakes. I absolutely believe that everything happens for a reason and that we have the choice to learn and grow or become weak and bitter.
Corby and I were introduced to a group called Bounce Night. We were interviewed by a couple of men who started the gathering to see if you were the kind of people they wanted in the group. It was a welcomed phone call when we were told we had passed and were welcome to come to Bounce Night the following Tuesday evening. At the time, Malia, being our youngest, it was easy to have date night on Tuesday and the girls could stay at home alone. The meeting was held in a palatial house at first, then the group continued to grow until we eventually had to find a business. Week after week we would "bounce" different money making ideas off each other. You could share of an opportunity you were considering to invest in with others. Others would share what they knew or didn't about the topic. It was such a great evening to be surrounded by like minded individuals. Eventually Corby and I were approached with multiple different investment opportunities. We prayed and fasted and did our due diligence on each company only to find great reviews and ultimately felt good inside to go forward.
1)The first company was with oil investing in Montana. We had $25,000 in the bank and freely handed it over. We figured we would get back our initial investment in two years using the pay scale we were quoted.
2)The second investment was with a lady named Emma Golding. She had real estate and several others opportunities. We gave her $50,000.
3)The third investment was real estate. The company was called REO Landmark. We gave them $13,000 and bought two homes. The company would fix up, rent and take care of all the business portion since the homes were not in state. The homes would be sold on a note and in 3 to 5 years the note would mature and we would walk away with $20 to $30k.
4) The final investment was for foreign exchange. This company we invested $65,000.
5) We invested with different start up internet companies at this same time. We just invested every last dollar we had access to.
So the concept was do nothing and let your money make you millions, right? Well, we knew it wasn't that simple but we also were hoping by taking a risk it would pay off and we could have a nice savings for our future. In the beginning, we would receive checks every month right on time. We were bringing in over $8,000 of passive income. We were smart and would apply the bulk of the money to paying ourselves back. We used up our savings as well as took out a second mortgage to invest. Our house had over $100k equity so we dipped into it and invested the money. We did the math and with the numbers we were quoted we would have paid all the debt back in less than 5 years.
The first year was smooth sailing and we were able to make some good payments and enjoy life a bit more. We never were super out of control, but we did enjoy life more than we had ever before.
Obviously all good things have to come to an end and our good things did slowly do just that. At first the payments were a little late, but they still arrived but eventually the payments ceased. We were stuck with over $183,000 worth of debt. It was an unbelievable amount of minimum monthly payments and I knew then and there we would lose our home and become homeless. I can't describe the feelings I had when I realized the magnitude of our one decision.
Corby and I sat down and figured out a budget, a strict no excess budget, and began living with bare essentials. During this time as well, Ada was born and in the NICU for a month which resulted in another $10k bill for us to absorb. We never even considered bankruptcy. We made this decision and we felt it was only right to pay back the money we borrowed.
6 years later we have $102,000 left of the $183,000 to pay back. We still own one of the two homes in Minnesota and they pay every month a couple of hundred dollars but the note will be closer to 20 years before it matures but we will take it!
I feel so blessed because we have not missed one payment on any of our monthly obligations.
I have struggled with why we would feel good about doing something that the Lord knew would not work out. I have felt abandoned by him. I have felt betrayed. I have struggled with these feelings for many years.
One day I felt prompted to read out of the Ensign, I opened it to an article on adoption. I was like, "OK, hello I am not adopting another kid, I have 5 already and can barely take care of them". I continued to feel like I needed to read from the magazine. I turned the page to the Parable of the BlackBerry Bush.
In a nutshell, this parable is about a little 2 year old boy who had wandered off in the backyard of his mother's friend's house. The mother, being unfamiliar with the surroundings, went looking for her small child. She could hear him whimpering and rushed to his side. He was tangled up in the thorns of a blackberry bush. She was able to free her son but noticed he had bruises and scratches and was bleeding from the thorns. The mother was angry with God that he would allow her precious innocent son to have to suffer such useless pain. While she was criticizing God, she could hear running water in the near distance. She walked to the edge of where her son was found only to see a fast flowing river just feet from her son. She realized then that the bush actually saved her son's life.
I felt the spirit engulf me as I read. I know that we had to be tangled in the thorns to keep us safe from something much worse a few feet away. I believe this to be true. Yes, the thorns(debt) are painful. Yes, have we had to do much less in our life because of this decision, Yes, but you know what if we had more money would we be worse off? What if we did invest with a different bigger amount and we couldn't recover. Yes, $183k is a lot of money but you know, we will recover.
The long story here is we made a foolish mistake, one we will never forget but I believe the things we have learned couldn't have been learned in any other way. Our kids will be better off not getting everything they possibly could have been given if we didn't have $1,000's of dollars going to pay off debt each month. The Lord is merciful, he provides us with the exact to get by with and a few wants every now and then. Some days do I pray he will take this trial from me, absolutely! I know he won't but the lessons I have learned and continue to learn are priceless.
We are tracking to be debt free of this 2nd mortgage in 4 years. I can't say this past 6 years has been fun, but it has been a learning experience and a faith builder. I believe I am a different individual because of this decision and I hope that I am allowing this to help me be a better person and a stronger person.
Three cheers for trials, hurray, hurray, hurray. (Especially when the trials are almost over)
I say this with fingers crossed that nothing else goes wrong in these next 4 years!
No comments:
Post a Comment